ESL Blogs

This is second of the three future blogs I promised in my blog "Catchy Blog Titles" :

Agony

Whatever I have for her is hidden in the far corner of my heart.  The worshipper’s prayer is not for any again, it doesn’t have any wish, the moth when attracted to the candle; he doesn’t have any expectation from the flame.  He is just attracted to it, just for its love.  I am burning,  burning in love.  Who gets the benefit of light of my burning is not my concern.

I was sad like the extinguished light.  My friend, the closest friend felt my gloom.  He came and sad beside me.  “You are looking extinguished, gloomy?”  He asked me, putting his arm around my neck.

“When did you see me bright and happy?”

“Oh! You are simmering inside very strongly, but you know this fire will turn you into ashes.  Won’t you tell me?”

I told him about the lost love, how she left me.

“Oh! That’s why, but you must promise me, you will never let this fire ebb out, which is burning inside you.  Life is nothing without this fire.  If it turns in to cold storage, such life is not life, It is like a burden, that’s why this simmering should remain inside, and this will keep you alive.  You know this burning, this pain, sometimes makes one do big things and make him stand distinguished.  A man sometimes passes his entire life having dampness in his heart, needing something to ignite the fire.  This girl who left you worked as an ignition to light the fire in you.  When you are lit by this fire, then you would not let it be extinguished.  Let it burn forever.”

I understood what he meant.  When it is destined to end at last, what is in just simmering and putting out.  It is pleasurable to be burnt in high flames and turn in to ashes forever.

Listen, I believe in your love, I know you love me, but I do not have any trust in the attack of changing time.  So if you happen to hate me, and the delicate petals of my heart become thorns to you, then do not remember the time we spent together, because the poison of memories does not allow the wounds to heal.  Never hate those chats we had sat together for hours, because the chats were the innocent link between the two hearts.  If I, my love, am not of any worth to you,  These chats are not responsible for this, they were innocent talks.  Just hate me, but not the circumstances we went through.