1. You give up the money and you and the person are still friends.

2. You give up the money and you and the person are not friends anymore.

3. You sue the person for the money.

4. In the first place, you don't lend people money.

5. Other than the above.

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    • Hello, Diah. Thank you for sharing your opinion.

  • Hi, Tam.

    Your questions are not easy to answer without knowing the circumstances under which they have not repaid your debts.
    Although I have never borrowed money from anyone, I am always generous, lend money or help when friends are in need.

    It can happen very quickly that someone needs money.
    NotAClue has listed a few reasons, circumstances, and situations.

    Friends who do not help each other even though they have had the opportunity to help, they are not real friends.
    Sometimes I don’t lend them money, but I pay the bill for food, entrance fees, etc. In that case, I don't expect the money back. If the amount of money is high, I expect them to repay it ... no matter how long it takes. I'm very patient in it ... but if I found someone to take advantage of me, I'd consider whether I would continue the friendship.

    • Hi, Rose. Thank you for sharing your opinion. If I found friends to take advantage of me, I think they are not friends anymore.

  • it depends how much did you loan to your friend and how close you guys are:

    I would do 1. if only loaned the small amount of money and he is my close friend

    I would do 2. if only loaded the small amounr of money and he is not close to me

    I would do 4. if he is not close to me or we just met each other

    of course doing 5. if I have loaned quite large amount haha

    • Hello, Ice lemon tea. Thank you for your comment. Hahaha, I wonder if you will do in the case of quite a large amount,

  • Hi, Tam,
    that is not so easy to answer. - I remember a time when I was younger, and needed the help of friends I always got generous help. With 21 I needed over night a place to sleep, and my friend let me live in the old nursery of her daughter for 3 months. When I was 23 I lost my apartment, and the best friend of my boss let me live in one of his flats (with all my stuff) for 2 months without taking any money. He didn't know me at all. That was a crazy time when suddenly rents got doubled, because there was a housing shortage in cities and landlords were taking advantage of that. When I found a new place (which was crazy expensive and still a dump!!) my best friend gave me the money for the realtor fee, which was three times the monthly rent. He borrowed money from his bank for this. I couldn't pay him back as quickly as I thought, because my car broke down right after that, and I had to fix that in order to get to uni and work. So in the end I needed almost a year instead of 3 months to pay him back. 

    Why I'm writing this extensive? I've lend big and small sums to friends over time, and I didn't get everything back. It doesn't bother me with small amounts and we are still friends. But it hurts when the sum is considerable, and when the person isn't making any real efforts to pay the money back, then that's also the end of the friendship. - Yes, there is the possibility to issue a default summons, but if the person doesn't have any money you'll never see your money again. Plus you have to pay for the payment summons and/or lawyer, which can be a lot of money on top of that. 

    I'm grateful because I had never to live on the street because of my friends during those tough times. So, I take it as a lesson to be more careful to whom I lend money, and I'm okay with that. 

    Greetings ;-)

    • Hello, NotAClue. Thank you for sharing your experience. I think that you are a reliable person so that you could get help from your friends. I agree with you, I don't want to be friends with people who are not making any real efforts to pay the money back.

      • Hmmm... yeah, maybe. I forgot to mention that all of them offered that help without I had even asked for it. In general I feel blessed with those people around me. Thanks for the topic. :) 

  • Arigato Tam! Fulfillment must not be lost between people. 

    • Hi, Dara. Thank you for your comment. Yes, of course.

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