ESL Blogs

This is written as a humorous message to my "gentlemen" chat friends on this site. For the "lady jokers", just read on and enjoy the laugh.

Please!!!!, (to all of you)... Watch this video first to "set the mood of the writing". https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVwG1t-NVAA  The concept was borrowed, yet, I truly love adding to it. It involves a bad tasting Mexican Beer that's imported to the United States.

Here's my list of additions; Enjoy all! Please, relax and smile.

1. When God created the Earth, he considered naming an eight day of the week in his name.

2. He's discovered continents on this planet that no one else knew existed.

3. He jumps out of an airplane and always lands safely on his feet. Parachutes are for "sissies".

4. (for my Christian friends)..Jesus walked on water,yet, he swims through land.

5. He wrestles alligators and crocodiles to warm up for his morning fitness regiment.

6. He owns a 20 foot long shark that lives in his personal swimming pool. Sometimes, he'll practice the backstroke (in the pool) with that beast, just to enjoy the challenge of a good, fair, fight.

7.His legend is so large that it casts it's own shadow. Even on a moonless night.

8. His ego is so strong that it would kill you with one "glancing blow", while one hand is tied behind his back.

9. When his day is going well, every person on the planet enjoys a holiday and celebrates.

10. When his day isn't going well for him, aliens from planets that are still unknown to humans shed a tear of sadness.

11. (This is another one is for my Christian friends) In 1984, they ordained him substitute pope for the day. John Paul needed to call in sick.

12. Like Moses; He has the ability to part the Red Sea. This ability is often used by him just to impress the women he dates.

13. Pilgrims make a yearly migration to his town of origin, just to walk in the hallowed footsteps of his childhood.

There it is. My top 13 list. Oh!! I almost forgot. "13" is an unlucky number in Western Culture and a serious superstition. I'd best add one more.

14. If he was the last existing sole on this planet; Mankind would still have a chance of existing.

The main point that I'm trying to get across is this (to all of my friends and readers). You can convey your opinion without using words or terms that will get you banned here on English Club.

Please, just be creative with the English Language. "Earn it, learn it, then flaunt it.". (at least in main chat, lolll!!!)

I miss so many of you when you vanish for a while due to your risky language.

Take Care All!!!