Is Love an Addiction?

After reading the title of this blog, some of you may think I went mad. Am I right? However, I have been thinking and thinking for a long time, many things popped up in my mind and the result of this process is a big chaos in my brain. Yes, these thoughts kind of killed my romantic, naive imagination of love and right now I would like to destroy your perception of romantic love by reading this blog :-D Am I mean? Not at all, just try to look at the things from my point of view for a while ;-)

 Warning: If you are a romantic soul, who doesn't want to kill their ideas, please stop reading right now! :-D

Let's start with some questions, so my dear reader, ask yourself and try to answer:

"What if we all just like an illusion that love is going to be the same forever as it was at the beginning?"

"Why we think that life without a person we love would be hell?"

"Why we feel nervous, down, lost when we are not sure about our love?"

"Isn't this all similar to the feelings of junkies, who enjoy being under the effect of drug and can't live without it?"

Love is a feeling. Some people think it is related to the heart but in my opinion it has more to do with our brain. Let me introduce this topic with one example, which can prove that love is probably a weird addiction.

Mary and Peter met each other at University. They spent a lot of time together and became the best friends. One day Mary got sick and couldn't meet Peter. What happened? Peter realised, how much Mary meant to him and that this was not just common friendship but love. He felt nervous, desperate, insecure, couldn't sleep becuase he missed Mary - he missed his drug. Some of those symptoms are symptoms of people, who are addicted to the drug and desperately miss it. Peter felt something new, he experienced abstinence syndrome. His love Mary then recovered from her illness and they both felt like they were born for each other. They had the same opinions, enjoyed their cool sense of humour and shared the same bright vision of their future. Peter and Mary got married and felt so happy. Every day they were drunk by their love (no wonder - they were drug to each other). Since their love got increased day by day, of course emotions it gave them were also more and more intensive. That is why some drug addicted people need after some time drug with better effect. Peter and Mary satisfied their needs by increasing their own emotions. To keep love at the same level forever is not easy and some people might fail because they find themself in monotone, stereotyped marriage or relationship. The same happened to our couple. In some years they both got changed, which is something natural. It caused that their opinions were not the same as they used to be, their sense of humour differed and imagination of their future became blurred. How come? Effect of the addiction started fading away and they were not able to keep it up. They stopped being drug to each other. What to do? Some people get on with it, others try to renew their marriage life and try to search again for all those feelings they used to have at the beginning. They go back to the past and want to find their drug addiction once more again. The last group of people move on and try to find a new drug. They want to feel, what they felt once more again but since their partner (drug) has no effect on them, they are dying to find their new love(drug).

So after this all I am still asking myself: "Is love an addiction?"

We feel nice with the partner we fell in love, we feel comfortable, wanted and this all may cause that we become emotionally addicted to this person. In short there is a big bond between the partners but it can work only in the case that both are addicted to each other. From my point of view this addiction should be healthy and shouldn't turn to obsession, otherwise it can destroy everything. As we know desperate people, who were dumped by their loved ones, were able to commit suicide. Why? They lost sense of their life, they lost their love (drug) and couldn't get over it becuase their love became their obsession. Luckily not all are weak. After break up, we go through something like a detoxicatoin therapy to get rid of our addiction, to forget bitter things that hurt us. I think that the only difference from drug addicted people is that this process is more emotional than physical.

Anyway, time is the best healer. Of course, as time passes by our addiciton gets weaker and weaker and one day we are again ready to enjoy this sweet addiction called LOVE.

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Comments

  • Camel, you take it too scientifically :-D just admit there is some chemistry and addiction that goes together actually you did admit it :D

    Estanis, thank you for your comment I will look up this song because I have no idea about it :-o

    Anne, now you made me think who I am but it depends on the situation and mood and many other factors. I wish I were able to use only my brain but you know women are emotional :-)

    Dilaaa, I am glad you read it! Life would be easier if we knew the future but love is also one big risk, ha? I am glad you agreed wtih me btw, thanx for comment!

    Desiree, firslty thank you for leaving your comment, secondly if we can love people we have never touched for example those virtual ones, I think we also can be addicted to their presence in our life, nah? btw as for marriage :-D hard to say if marriage can kill the love or if we were not born as monogamous :-p

  • Addiction is merely showing great interest on something or someone.  

    You're asking if love is an addiction, yes it can be.  And any form of addiction always brings an unfavorable result whether on a large scale or small scale.  That's why we are told to take everything in moderation.  When someone is addicted, it means his heart rules over his head and moderation has nothing to do with the heart.  It is the mind that controls and the heart that gives.

    I believe that you, Luci is someone who lets the mind rule over the heart.  Otherwise, you won't be able to come up with this argumentative blog.  

    I guess, you are trying to catch those members who are pro-mind and those who are pro-heart... hahaha!  Interesting!  

    Thanks for a quickie comeback!  

  • Hmmm... Well, I guess it's so easy to look for another drugs when the one you have doesn't have effect any more although there're lot of them sooo clever and take advantage of your situation to get into your life and try to replace it :D Then, it's when our mind or will power have to work to find out what we really want.
    Btw, the title blog recalled me to Robert Palmer's song, lol.
  • felipe, thanx for your opinion :-)

    setareh, I agree with your point and maybe we should distinguish between positive and negative addiction in this case :-D thank you for your comment.

    Salem, thank you for your comment I agree and btw love can be also destructive, don't you think so? However, as I have said... addiction with positive impacts can be also addiction, nah? I am not talking bad about love, I am not against it.

  • Addiction associates with destructive impact, so as long as loving some one has positive impact, it's good and is worth to be called "love". But if it does not have good effects, it must be an addiction. Better to get rid of it. Nice blog
  • I think Passion is an addiction... Love is a decision

  • Loool Expector! Yes..good point that drugs migh kill us. Btw I have heard of people who died of Broken Heart. However, I can't say love would destroy our health...it makes us happy. Btw let's make positive addiction of it :D
  • By the way, I've never taken any drugs. I can imagine how it feels to suddenly abstain from the drugs, though. 

  • Interesting comparison!

    But we encourage love, not drug addiction - the former can be so beneficial to our health while the latter is not. That's to say, we encourage you to give up drugs, but never to give up love. 

    Nevertheless, still a fun topic!

  • Maya,

    thank you for your "short" comment, I do appreciate you answered! WOOOW!

    I think that the person we love is our DRUG, so the feeling we call LOVE is in this case addiction, I meant it like this ;-) Of course, we can live without people we love but since they are our drug we are addicted to, such imagination might be nightmare for some people :-) As for comment that we feel high, I agree and this is something what made me think about LOVE and ADDICION :-D

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