Judging each other...why are we not more preoccupied with judging ourselves? Why is it much easier for us to pinpoint what is wrong with someone else, but when it comes to looking at our faults and assessing them....we just falter and find it something very difficult to do?Is this something in our nature, being oblivious to our shortcomings? Or is it just the nature of some of us? Can we control this urge to form an opinion about someone else or is it something uncontrollable?My personal opinion is that it is controllable! It is......Instead of providing our opinion on what someone should've done but didn't do, why don't we try putting ourslevs in their situation. We are all human beings......we are all affected by emotions and feelings that are sometimes stronger than any rational thinking. How many times did you offer advice to a friend, but when faced with the same problem, were unable to solve it? The simple reason for that is that it was easy for us to see the solution when our judgement was not clouded by our emotions. I may seem off-topic here, but what I am trying to say is that we shouldn't judge people because we don't know what we would've done if we were in their situation. Ideally, we shouldn't judge people PERIOD. But I know that that is asking for too much.sometimes, not saying anything is the best you can do. Sometimes, no matter how hard you try, there is nothing comforting enough that can be said to make someone feel better. I have been in situations where a friend of mine would be beating herself up for doing something that she shouldn't have done...and at these times, what she needs to hear is that it's ok...it's ok to make a mistake...we are not perfect....don't beat yourself about it.....you are not a bad person.......it's a good thing that at least you realize that you did something wrong, some people never do. Move on...learn from your mistakes...learn from the mistakes of others....grow......and move on.I'm not saying that we shouldn't form an opinion about things done around us....of course we should. Otherwise, we will never learn. But what I'm saying is that it should not reflect how we view a person. Our opinion should not give us the right to decide if that person is good or bad. Somehow, that would mean that you are a better person...but are you?A quote comes to mind: "I have never met a man who was not my superior in some particular" (Ralph Waldo Emerson)
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Hello my dear Zahra
Thanks a lot my dear for your effective share here. I see a lot of people who give a randome judgments about others without any hesitation or even thinking that they may face the same situation and did the same thing. This makes me annoyed and very sad. So, I agree with that, we should give advice in the best way, and never give judgments or decide this person is bad or not. We don't have the standards of goodness or evil. Thanks again my dear to read this topic and give us your wise opinion about it.
best wishes
Hi lovely Reem...
a masterpiece i see here ...your speech is so effective ...you should read it loud to all of us...to the whole world...we judge based on what ???? why do we always try to feel superior than others...you know sometimes we don't have any bad intentions;we don't want to pretend that we are better or so ....we want to really help the other person....we know what perfection is ;so we judge based on our desires ...but it is not practical to see a person perfect in all aspects of life...it is hardly possible ;there can be exceptions though...
yeah,you are absolutely correct...when we are put in others' shoes ,then we can feel what they really felt...but just talking out of experience is easy but in no way effective...
instead of judging people ,as you said ,we should just give our opinions in the best way possible...we can bring examples of our own lives or others' to tell our audience who is making a mistake that they won't get a good result out of what they are doing ...but in many cases our advice may not work...you know people UNDERSTAND ,when they THEMSELVES experience sth even fatal...so to let a person fully understand sth ,it is better to let them do whatever they want ...to make mistakes...but as we feel pity for them ,we should try our best not to let them draw regrettable memories for themselves...they should weigh the gravity of the situation themselves ...we say our opinion ,but it is up to them to see if it is worth doing what they want to do...
meanwhile any kinds of advices we should keep this in our minds that we are not perfect as well...your precious saying must be highlighted here :Our opinion should not give us the right to decide if that person is good or bad.
thanks a lot for your nice piece of writing,
have a peaceful time:)
Hello my dear Marianna
Your comments always wise and carry a great meaning. We should grow up and learn more about ourself. Thanks mz dear for nice comment.
Best wishes for you
Marianna said:
I agree with you 100% - If you don't make mistakes it is because you are died! :-) Besides, if we were perfect, what could we learn? When I judge someone else, I try to bring him/her to MY side. I am not exchanging anything but watching the world sitting on my couch, being comfortably unfair. If we see it deeply, we can understand that it is a childish behavior, very anti-social too. We need grow up, we have to learn more about ourselves. See you, my friend!
Hello Saso
You are right my
dear. we should be aware to avoid keep judging each others. I like
the proverb so much. Thanks a lot for your a great comment.
Best wishes
Saso said:
Dear Reem ,
I think we all go on the same way , no one can admitt his flows and say it , it is easier to judge the others than criticize ourselves . When we talk about others flows we can avoid thinking about ours , by this way any one can feel confidant even if he is imperfect in reality , but at least he sees himself as a strong one . I think we should be aware to avoid keep judging each others , we have an arabic proverb that say " who always watch what people do will die coz of worries " ...
I agree with you 100% -
If you don't make mistakes it is because you are died! :-) Besides, if we were perfect, what could we learn?
When I judge someone else, I try to bring him/her to MY side. I am not exchanging anything but watching the world sitting on my couch, being comfortably unfair.
If we see it deeply, we can understand that it is a childish behavior, very anti-social too. We need grow up, we have to learn more about ourselves.
See you, my friend!
I think we all go on the same way , no one can admitt his flows and say it , it is easier to judge the others than criticize ourselves . When we talk about others flows we can avoid thinking about ours , by this way any one can feel confidant even if he is imperfect in reality , but at least he sees himself as a strong one . I think we should be aware to avoid keep judging each others , we have an arabic proverb that say " who always watch what people do will die coz of worries " ...
Replies
Thanks a lot my dear for your effective share here. I see a lot of people who give a randome judgments about others without any hesitation or even thinking that they may face the same situation and did the same thing. This makes me annoyed and very sad. So, I agree with that, we should give advice in the best way, and never give judgments or decide this person is bad or not. We don't have the standards of goodness or evil. Thanks again my dear to read this topic and give us your wise opinion about it.
best wishes
a masterpiece i see here ...your speech is so effective ...you should read it loud to all of us...to the whole world...we judge based on what ???? why do we always try to feel superior than others...you know sometimes we don't have any bad intentions;we don't want to pretend that we are better or so ....we want to really help the other person....we know what perfection is ;so we judge based on our desires ...but it is not practical to see a person perfect in all aspects of life...it is hardly possible ;there can be exceptions though...
yeah,you are absolutely correct...when we are put in others' shoes ,then we can feel what they really felt...but just talking out of experience is easy but in no way effective...
instead of judging people ,as you said ,we should just give our opinions in the best way possible...we can bring examples of our own lives or others' to tell our audience who is making a mistake that they won't get a good result out of what they are doing ...but in many cases our advice may not work...you know people UNDERSTAND ,when they THEMSELVES experience sth even fatal...so to let a person fully understand sth ,it is better to let them do whatever they want ...to make mistakes...but as we feel pity for them ,we should try our best not to let them draw regrettable memories for themselves...they should weigh the gravity of the situation themselves ...we say our opinion ,but it is up to them to see if it is worth doing what they want to do...
meanwhile any kinds of advices we should keep this in our minds that we are not perfect as well...your precious saying must be highlighted here :Our opinion should not give us the right to decide if that person is good or bad.
thanks a lot for your nice piece of writing,
have a peaceful time:)
Your comments always wise and carry a great meaning. We should grow up and learn more about ourself. Thanks mz dear for nice comment.
Best wishes for you
Marianna said:
You are right my
dear. we should be aware to avoid keep judging each others. I like
the proverb so much. Thanks a lot for your a great comment.
Best wishes
Saso said:
If you don't make mistakes it is because you are died! :-) Besides, if we were perfect, what could we learn?
When I judge someone else, I try to bring him/her to MY side. I am not exchanging anything but watching the world sitting on my couch, being comfortably unfair.
If we see it deeply, we can understand that it is a childish behavior, very anti-social too. We need grow up, we have to learn more about ourselves.
See you, my friend!
I think we all go on the same way , no one can admitt his flows and say it , it is easier to judge the others than criticize ourselves . When we talk about others flows we can avoid thinking about ours , by this way any one can feel confidant even if he is imperfect in reality , but at least he sees himself as a strong one . I think we should be aware to avoid keep judging each others , we have an arabic proverb that say " who always watch what people do will die coz of worries " ...
Thanx deary for nice topic .
Have a nice day