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This country is hot, I thought. It isn’t like the place where I come from. The sun is about to set from the clear sky and it is warm enough to take the thunderstorms from my heart away. “How are you?” she asked without turning round. “Are you all right?” “No,” I said carelessly and turned to face her in a dull way. Indefiniteness is a true killer. It makes us impatient and causes more troubles. We both know we have to move forward, and come up with better ideas. Maybe, we need a miracle. We helplessly need somebody to tell us all these what happened were a joke. I seriously wish there was a go-back button on my brain because, I keep thinking there is no way out from this. Where is this road taking me to?
(Six days ago)
I saw my rescuer’s silhouette in the darkness. Suddenly, a hole opened up inside me, the hole became wider and wider. Who was this man and why did he save me? Just as suddenly as it had opened, the hole inside me closed up when I saw a smile on my rescuer’s face. There were plenty of questions I wanted to ask, but all I remember was when I woke up, I was in another place and right beside me was my Twin. I gradually found out that I was brought here. I was surrounded by a bright light now. The place and being with a person I love made me feel secure and peaceful.
It had been some days since we were waiting in this house. Why waiting rather than taking an action? Weren’t we supposed to take revenge for Anele? Time was running and waiting was the true killer itself. But, what to do?
We came to a cottage. It was left in total darkness. Inside was in a worse situation. It seemed like we were those first people who came here after a very long time. “Now we must rest,” Syubi said, picking up the sheets on the furniture. “We will think of what to do tomorrow. Are you hungry?”
The pain. This pain is not like anything else. Since the incident, time has passed so slowly for me. Tears of anger began to flow down my cheeks. They were murdered. I was saved though I wish I wasn’t. I couldn’t do anything for them. I feel so desperate. “Maybe I will have to kill myself eventually, but I will kill her first. I promise on Anele’s and my Twin’s memories that I will kill Asma first!” I was drifting into a deep sleep and those were my last conscious thoughts. I remember I repeated it even in my dream.
(One week and some hours ago)
“Here you are, you ugly birds!” said Nida suddenly appearing behind us. Have you found my album? I suppose I wanted you to read it; otherwise, why would I have left it out? I wanted you to know what I can do when I am angry!” Nida went on, shouting angrily. Her face was as dark as the sky without any stars. Evil terror rose up in her. It wasn’t at all surprising that she lost her temper and made the situation threatening for us. The console next to the wall was quaking under her hands and it made a frame fall onto the floor and break into pieces. She looked at it, then at us, and her face twisted. Her wrinkles seemed frightening more than ever. She grasped the knife and threw it into the air as if there she was fighting with people trying to pull her back. It took some seconds she carelessly caught Anele and stabbed her from the throat. Anele fell onto the floor barely breathing, lying there motionlessly. “Now look what you’ve made me do!” Nida yelled. There was a pause, a terrible silence for a few seconds, then she sighed. “I suppose I’ll kill you, too. I don’t want to leave anybody left.”
The morning is, however, breezy and dull. There is a disquieting feeling inside me. Yesterday, however, I have managed to keep it at the bay, now this bedeviled feeling is with me again. I wonder if I have left anything else to accomplish in this life. Where I am doesn’t really matter now. What matters is that all my beloveds are far away now – too far. I keep thinking, and it makes me misled. Maybe, I should just stop this for a while and listen to them. Today, we are going to meet an important person as he said yesterday. I hope to find some answers – finally, today…
to be continued…
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