I`m returning!

I`m returning!

Hey!

I have not been active here for several months. This is mainly due to the fact that I moved to another city and settled down here. I constantly have new plans reborn, how to help others and myself in learning English, and I constantly do not have enough time to start realizing them with high quality.
This evening  I was doing a task that sounds like this: Write a short but exciting story, beginning with the phrase "Jack was asleep in the chair, dreaming, when the phone rang ". I bring my essay to your attention. Please rate it. I tried to make an audio recording, but I do not know if it worked out and if my English is clear. Just in case, I will leave the text itself.
I also suggest that you compose a story that starts with the same phrase. Or let's start like  a new game, with the same rules and different phrases for beginning?! I think it's interesting how different people do it. Don't worry, I won't use this for my own personal gain. This is just a part of my homework from the English course I am taking, and the completed assignment inspired me to start this blog.
Here's my story: Story.m4a

Jack was asleep in the chair, dreaming, when the phone rang. "Who would be it so late?"-he thought, and slowly began to move to the source of this sound. He couldn't move fast because of his injury in the spine after the car crash. Today his 60. He was guessing that somebody in the last hours of the holiday day wishes to congratulate him.
He didn't wrong. But for this time, this wasn't just the next one congratulation. It was his wife, the voice of which he hadn't heard for five years! It was the first dialogue after her entrance from a coma!
For a moment he returned thoughts to those terrible car crash but invaded happiness didn't let him to thought about it. He talked to her today's morning during a visit to the hospital, but she couldn't answer him. But now he heard her!
It was incredible! The best Birthday present of all his life!
The conversation was brief. Interlocutors were known what the best have to do. She already asked a doctor about her husband's late visit to her hospital room.

Thank you for your attention and participation!

Votes: 0
E-mail me when people leave their comments –

You need to be a member of MyEnglishClub to add comments!

Join MyEnglishClub

Comments

  •          Sorry my friend I can’t complete the story. It is not easy to write one. Writing one needs several elements such as, talent, passion, patience, time etc. ………. Unfortunately I don’t have anything from those previous elements. So finally, I hope you will accept my apology. God bless you.

              Thanks for the nice blog.   

    • That's all OK!

      Warm welcome for all kinds of participation !

      I sure you have great number other talents, passions etc.

      I think, patience and time don't have at least  sometimes most of the population of Earth :).

    • >>>I don’t have anything from those previous elements.<<<
      Nah, nah... I can't believe that. Maybe tomorrow you feel like writing something for us. :)

  • Here is my story, Augustina. I'm not sure whether I have time to record it later. I hope that's okay.

    Jack was asleep in the chair, dreaming, when the phone rang. He opened his eyes and looked around, his cell was ringing. It was God again. He was calling for the 23th time this day. "Yes", he answered half asleep. "Jack, you haven't helped your neighbor, yet, like I asked you to. He is drunk and he is riding his bike again. Help him! You promised you'd help him the last time I called you. Now it's 23 minutes later and you're still watching sports, or have you been sleeping?" God was upset he could hear that. "Nooo, God. I'm doing my taxes", Jack answered. "RIGHT!" God chuckled. But Bob is drunk and wants to ride his bike. You must help him now, or something bad will happen".

    Jack scowled, "Okay, God, I'm on my way." Jack was annoyed. God was always calling him, never his wife, never his son, only him. "Okay then, have a good day, Jack!" God chuckled again and hang up.

    When Jack woke up he sprang to life immediately. Almost at the backdoor he looked at his cell again. No calls all day! The last call was from his wife yesterday night when he was late. I wonder if this was a true calling he said to himself. But what shall I do if this is true? What would happen when Bob was aggressive and fighting his help? He looked outside. His neighbor was working in his garden. He didn't look drunk at all. So it was all a dream! Nothing bad would happen. Jack relaxed and smiled again.

    Slowly he turned back to his chair and observed his neighbor for some time. Bob was sweating. He was planting a small tree in front of his porch. "Moron!", he thought, such a tiny tree... That's so easy! But then he thought again. Actually, my son was helping me. "Hmm...", he muttered. "Bob doesn't have a son. He doesn't even have a family." "Hmm..." Refusing he set one foot in front of the other. He was at the backdoor again and already calling "WAIT! Let me help you, Bob" He dashed over and was holding the tree with firm hands, smiling.

    Bob looked up, aghast. They hadn't talked in 23 years. Ever since this terrible fight in the pub, when Jack was drunk and wanted to ride his bike...

    • 9217171298?profile=RESIZE_400x

    • Impressive!! Nanny. Watta nice writing! You got talent for sure, a writer of great narrative power. The plot, characters are nicely woven, twist at the end. I like your word of choice.

    • Thx, Shaheen. I'm happy that you like it. :) We are waiting for your participation. ;)

    •         Wow, really you have a promising talent. I think if you seriously work on it, your name will be well-known around the whole world. God bless you.

    • sewar, you're sweet. Thx. :)

    • Wow! Incredible!

      Is it really your first attempt to write stories? 

This reply was deleted.