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One day I wrote English chat in google and just kept clicking what came next. Somehow my account was made and I was on EC. There was a small window on the lower right corner that was scrolling. To ma great amusement, they were people talking in real time. 

The idea of different people sitting in all different parts of the world and chatting in real time really amused me. For days I kept thinking that I was some fake software that would just repeat random sentences. I thought to experiment. After a couple of days, I figured out that they were real people. 

Soon I found myself talking and dedicating all ma attention to only one lady on the EC chat room. She became ma centre of attention. I would only come online if she was there. 

"A rose can be ma garden, a friend ma whole universe"... Someone has said this just for me :)

She became famous, even became a mod and then she left because she was done improving her English. I had dreamt some real dreams with her. I dreamt to be on the same coffee table with her some day. For some time, I thought that she was for real. But sighs, all what was real for me was virtual for her. She never took ma dreams seriously. I was broken and I left.

Once I remember I was telling to someone here that I was attahed to someone here, she started to laugh at me. She said the word attach reminds me of an email attachment or a file, how become you become attached... I was never in love with her but for a moment I made the mistake to think that I had her somewhere in ma life.... She was never there... 

You know why I kept changing ma names here, I never wanted someone to get attached to me here, I never wanted to hurt someone giving her the belief that I was real. And now the silence here assures me that I succeeded in not getting people attached to me.... Though somewhere along this journey I failed... Yes, I am the fool who thought EC was for real.... I was the fool who thought that we were connected and had each other. Now when years after years, there is not even a single activity on ma account, I try to convince myself that this place is not for real. It has always been a programmed software who would say hello in return to ma hello. I shall have to live by the rest of ma life with the believing they were all robots programmed to improve the Enlgish of others... Heavens, Nafis, Anele, Yasmin, Scarlett, Ha,..... all robots.....

I started this blog and went at 1 o'clock midnight and it's is 1:20am now here and I am in no mood to go back correct the mistakes... :) 

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Comment by smile on July 14, 2017 at 16:29
Dear, Luci,
Others never fell. My strategy worked. The silence on my page is the evidence that it worked. But I fell. Missing them and making my self look like a loser here.
My concerns were what if someone got stucked with me and I got stucked with someone. Nobody ever got stucked with me. I managed to save them from the ditch or maybe they were all mature peoples by themselves. But I couldn't save myself... I thought those dreams were real
Comment by smile on July 14, 2017 at 16:19
Dear, Rosemary,
I am glad you like my read.
Comment by smile on July 14, 2017 at 16:18
Thanks, dear Paula... I would have been really disappointed if you guys wouldn't have showed up here. Thanks for sharing strength to the weak.
Comment by Luci on July 14, 2017 at 6:34
Where is the logic? :D You didn't want to be close to others but on the contrarery you miss some people and feel disappointed none posted anything on your wall??? People here are real and all have some feelings.... so to avoid disappointment you better stay away? :D life is about emotions and to have good people around who make you feel good is worth it! Wake up, Fahim Robot! Btw it ain't such a big deal to recognize you :D
Comment by Rosemary on July 13, 2017 at 23:54

     Well , i was planning  to write  a same blog about my experience here in the English Club  :) I do miss many people  here . But  I am not in the chat room anymore  . Sometimes   , I just pass by to see what's  going around   , then I disconnected  quickly 

                          Thanks for sharing  all ur honest and real emotions   , I enjoyed  reading  :) :) :)

Comment by ★ღ ˚ Paula✰ •* ˚ on July 13, 2017 at 22:43

Thank you Smile for sharing.  I love this story.  Yes it is true we come here and make friends and all too soon they go about their way and we lose touch.  It is sad.  I look at it that I was fortunate to have met them in the first place and I wish them much success in their endeavors.  So although I miss them.  I am happy for them.  EC has been here a long time.  People will come and go.  You may also and when you do we will miss you.  Never believe we will all disappear, for in this day and age we have so much technology that enables us to stay in contact.  So look forward to friends you will have that will be with you each and every day.  We are real Smile.  Believe it......HUGGGGGGGGGG

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